Fourteener, Schmorteener

Here we are a few weeks into the school year, and 2020 continues to be a year to remember. Or forget. I’m not sure yet.

 We hit another milestone as we dropped our college boy off at CSU, to discover that all of his roommates decided to not show up.  Stupid COVID. We drove away, leaving the kid who has shared a room with his little brother most of his life in an empty quad. The following week began on line learning for the other 3 kids, learning to rely on technology that is as fickle as the wind. One day it works, then the next you can’t submit any assignments. That’s been fun.

 

Everyone is learning to adjust and right about the minute we start to complain I’m reminded this is a GLOBAL issue, and then I loudly remind all the children that at least we have food and clean water and no one is throwing bricks through our windows. They don’t visibly appreciate this, but deep, deep down, I am sure they must.

 

Everyone needs something fun to do in the middle of a pandemic. For some it might be to go to a beach, or visit a field of sunflowers, or ride on a trolley through San Franscisco. I’d like to do all of those things very much, but instead of doing something leisurely, I chose to climb 4 mountain peaks in one day. They were all 14,000+ and not one second of the day was disappointing, even the parts when I thought I might fall off a cliff.

 

We started the climb at 7:30 am, and were back at the car by 5:00pm. Our good friend Mark showed us the way, and we began the ascent. I knew I was in trouble when I was out of breath before we had gotten out of the parking lot. I developed a nice little migraine that lasted the whole day long the second we gained elevation, but in spite of the pain, I saw beauty.  The best part was getting to experience a day like that with my sweet son Jack who despite not working out a day in his life, ended up crushing those 4 peaks like a boss.

 

A girl can learn a lot about herself when climbing 4 mountains in one day:

 

I learned I have a lot of baggage, and sometimes I make my load way too heavy. I learned that I can overcome my fears. I learned that jagged rocks aren’t just dangerous, but they were perfect for holding onto in times need. I learned that I doubt more than I trust. I learned that I love the valley as much as I love the mountain peak.

 

I learned there’s nowhere to pee above the tree line. I learned you have to drink a lot of water anyway. I learned that putting an ankle brace on BEFORE rolling your ankle on the climb is essential. I learned that adrenaline is a real thing. I learned that I like the ascent more than the descent. I learned that I don’t always need to talk, and that sometimes just breathing and moving forward is the best time to hear God.

 

As we descended the last peak, we hit the hardest terrain we had seen all day. The ground moved with each step, and sometimes the only way to move forward was sliding on my butt. I fell too many times to count and my head pounded.  Jack took the lead and coached us down, as our real guide had already made it to the car hours before us. Every 20 feet or so Jack would shout, “Great job! Look what you just did!” and then I would try and look back only to get dizzy and almost fall off the edge. Despite my complaints, Jack found the safest paths for us and showed us which rocks to step on and to avoid. That’s quite a moment, when a mom looks to her firstborn son for life saving advice. I was so glad he was there.

 

When Billy picked me up after it was all said and done, I felt myself relax for the first time in 16 hours. He is my ride or die, and even though he wasn’t on the mountain that day, I knew he was cheering me on from start to finish. And he got me Oreos and Chick-fil-a. What more could a girl want?

 

2020 may be a year full of giant mountainous obstacles for mankind, but I have no doubt that God is in control, and when we look back on what we have accomplished, we might be a little dizzy, but I hope we will see how faithful God was through it all. How His hands were holding us, through storms, riots, unrest, homeschooling, politics, illness… and that He didn’t leave our side, not even for one single second.

 

Rest in these words written so long ago, to know when all of this feels overwhelming and the unknowns rock you to your core:

 

Micah 4:1

“In the last days the mountain of the LORD's temple will be established as the highest of the mountains; it will be exalted above the hills, and peoples will stream to it.”

How does your garden grow?

  

If you have never gardened, you are completely missing out. I had no idea what an amazing experience growing one’s own food does for a soul. It’s almost magical. One day you plant a seed, and then next day you eat food from the plant. Well, not exactly the next day, but soon after.

 

This winter, since the world shut down and I could no longer go to the Outlets, I decided we all needed a project. Jack got to lay pavers to expand our patio, and did an amazing job, even if he did break a few bricks. Will got to finish our basement, literally, and everything that goes along with that. Not bad for a 15 year old kid. Faith focused on school and perfecting the French macaron. Billy focused on keeping his job in this crazy global upside-down world as well helping Will not die while using all kinds of saws and shooty nail things. Zoe and I decided our project would be to become gardeners since Billy shot down my original idea to start breeding exotic cats.

 

We had no idea we were going to be amazing gardeners. All credit goes to God, as it always should. He made the dirt, provided the water, and gave us the knowledge on how to make food come out of the ground and into our mouths. Zoe and I wanted something substantial to eat, and since you can’t grow gummy bears and Golden Oreos, we decided to focus on the potato. We chose two different kinds, tilled our soil, fertilized the ground, and planted the seed potatoes one cold March day. (#researchpaysoff)

 

We were so pumped to know we had an actual garden growing, and decided to expand our food options so we began to plant seeds for other foods like tomatoes and cilantro. When the first little green sprouts began to grow for all of the above, Zoe and I screamed. We talked to them. We watered them. We told them we couldn’t wait to eat them.

 

On Mother’s Day, we headed to Lowe’s and bought a few more plants to complete the garden. We watched and waited, checked it every morning, and before we knew it, we had an actual garden. Respectable even. The potato plants grew as tall as Zoe, and we watched for the tops to die so we would know when to harvest them. Our tomatoes took their sweet time, but finally decided to turn red. I like to think they blushed for us, since all we did was count them every day and tell them how wonderful they were. We began to have zucchini bigger than our cats, and jalapenos hotter than noon on the 4^th of July.

 

By mid summer, the potatoes were ready to be dug up. Zoe and I included our little 2 year old twin nephews, Ezra and Elias, who were visiting from Missouri. Now that I am an experienced gardener, I believe in teaching children how to live off the land while they are young. Every time the four of us dug up a sprout, we shouted like it was Christmas morning, “Another one! Another one!”. By the end of our harvest, we had hundreds of Yukon Golds, and Red potatoes. We laughed and laughed and were so excited to see the fruit of our labor in tangible results.

 

And just the other day, we were blown away by the first real live watermelon sitting there as if she couldn’t wait to be discovered. Zoe was the first to spot her, screamed appropriately, followed by my screams, less appropriate, but still loud. We could not believe our eyes. At least 4 of them, all taking over the area where we pulled out the potatoes. We can’t wait to taste the sweet goodness.

 

I’m reading a book by Beth Moore, called Chasing Vines, and in the first chapter she talks a lot about God being a gardener. She talks about how proud God was of His work, and how excited He is when his product produces fruit. I can relate on a much smaller scale, as I look over my garden, my household, my marriage, my kids, and see the fruit of abiding to the Vine. I can do the part about abiding, but I’ll admit I’m not as fond of being “pruned” as the Bible says in John 15. One thing I’ve learned is that God has to prune even the good branches in order for us to keep producing fruit. Simply put, even when you are headed in the right direction, you still need to rid yourself of the distractions that are keeping you from growing into the person God is calling you to be. Sometimes it’s really painful, but when you can focus your energy into what is blooming, the end result will be growth, fruit, and peace.

 

To sum up the lesson I have thus far learned in 2020: get a project, stay the course, abide in Christ.

 

“Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.  I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in Me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from Me, you can do nothing.”

 

John 15:4-5

 

 

 

 

 

Back When

 I don’t trust anyone who says they hate County music.  Country music has many great qualities, such as the banjo. Another bonus is that many of the artists often love Jesus, and while I remind my son Will of this fact, he often rebuts me with a line from Thomas Rhett’s new single, “There ain’t nothing a beer can’t fix”, and then he says in a very judgmental tone, but “he loves Jesus too right mom?”  This does not deter me from listening and singing along, even though I know in reality there ain’t nothing Jesus can’t fix.  

 Country music tells a story, and sure there might be a “hell” or “damn” to bleep out, but there’s always an adventure even if it does involve whiskey, losing your dog, and watching the love of your life drive down a red dirt road away from you forever.  Tim McGraw sings a few of my absolute favorites, including his “Back When”.  Who doesn’t like reliving the good ole days? A few lines…  “Back when a hoe was a hoe, coke was a coke, and cracks what you were doing when you were cracking jokes…”. Oh man, I think we’d all like to go Back When, before the global pandemic turned the world upside down.

 

Last night as I lay in bed, I realized I’d like to go Back When I could eat sugar like I did as a 20something, no ill effects. No insomnia, no cramping, no queasiness. I won’t be having another “wintogreen” life saver eating contest with Will again anytime soon.

 

I remember 8 years ago, Back When my sister and I took all our kids to 6 Flags, and we learned that we had passed the age of enjoying spinning rides. We wanted so badly to be the cool moms who rode them all, screamed the loudest, shouted “no hands” while our scared children looked on in awe.  So we got on the Spider, our first spinning ride for the day.  During the pauses at the top, we looked over at each other and noticed the other sister was green.  Yet somehow pale. Maybe it was just the elevation.  Se we tried the Octopus, low to the ground but still a thrill. Again, there was screaming and clinging, and all the while when it was over, we tasted remnants of the cotton candy we’d eaten hours earlier.  We had to admit, our 40something year old bodies didn’t like to spin anymore. 

 

As we get ready to drop Jack at college, I seriously want to go Back When.  Back when Jack’s biggest decision of the day was whether to have pbj or frozen nuggets.  What costume to wear, Hulk or Spiderman? What color light saber to play with, green or red?

 

I’d like to go Back When to the first day of school when we actually took the children to the school building, dropped them off, came home, and cried that they were gone. This year we will take pictures of our kids, probably still in their pajamas, and then the children will all go inside to begin their day online. I am pretty sure there will still be tears.

 

I take little comfort in the words of Merle Haggard, “If we make it through December, everything’s gonna be alright I know”.  A lot of us can’t wait to make it through December, we just need to make it through today. Country music is good, but God’s songs are better, and today I’ll take my solace in His Word, trusting Him even when I want to go Back When.

 

Psalm 39:7 “And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in You.”

2020 I can't wait to have hindsight.

Where does one even begin? 

The year began like most years, New Year’s Resolutions and new beginnings-- all the razzle dazzle of life, then boom!  Three months into the year Billy lost a tooth. The next day, the world shut down. Needless to say, we all had to stare at Billy’s toothless mouth for months while everyone on planet Earth struggled to grasp a new normal. 

While Billy’s inconvenient dental issues were annoying, we found ourselves feeling very grateful. People we knew were sick with this new unknown disease. Friends were losing jobs, and fear was gripping the hearts of so many. We didn’t turn on the tv much, unless it was to watch something that made us laugh.  We regretted the Tiger King. We baked too many macarons and didn’t eat vegetables. We hiked, and hiked, and hiked. We wore our masks.  We thanked God for jobs, toilet paper, and a roof over our heads.

Nothing has really changed in 6 months. We are still grateful, still figuring out the new normal, still wearing masks…and we remain grateful. Maybe some of us regret all the baking, but at least Billy has started the process to fix his tooth situation. We got a kitten hoping Zoe maybe would forget that she has hardly seen another child since March 15. We started a garden, and we learned that we are amazing potato farmers. We are thankful for the bounty and gladly eat what the the good Lord gave us. We feel afraid at times, when cities are on fire and everyone is angry. We feel sad for the lady who yelled at me “Can’t you read?” at the grocery store for going up the when the arrow said to go down.

The coming months don’t bring clarity, but they do bring confusion. My children’s school schedules (remote, home, on campus) upsets my stomach so much I have to drink Smooth Move Tea at exactly 6 pm every evening.  My new kitten has started scratching the furniture. I still have to buy toilet paper, because we learned that even stock piles eventually run out. My senior might not have a prom, and my college student might not live at college. My homeschooled kid wants everyone to go to school, and my elementary student is tired of hearing me say “go play”. Somehow we still smile. We play a lot of skip-bo, and sit outside talking about nothing and everything. We connect because we have to. We love the time together. Even when it feels like too much sometimes.

There certainly are reasons to be sad and fearful at times, and I’d be a liar if I said I never got sad about this upside-down world we are living in. But every single morning since COVID 19 came onto the scene, God has remained on the throne. Nothing has surprised Him about this disease, the riots, political unrest, and everything else that often surprises me. So sure, I may need to feed myself a macaron or 7, in order to cope, but God really does have His eyes and Hands on the Earth and I will trust Him.

Philippians 4:13

“I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”